laura marie marciano
THIS IS A SHIT POST ON REDDIT |
I was in the city for Sandy and
when ASAPs album dropped the loud kids outside the door and you would say it’s the weekend baby let them be loud let them And you quit smoking because my head hurts and you never drank a drink because I did not drink and you knew more than I did And I would sing Video Games to you and you would tell me Lana was your dream girl and that you wanted me for the rest of your life and our daughter would have breasts like mine and I said that is weird shit to say for the rest of your I swear now I agree with every girl in the car who told me something and all those Taxi drivers who had to look at me twice through the mirror when you touch me a familiar way or took photos of me naked on your Blackberry when God said ok and nodded and said ok |
MY BODY HAS NEVER BEEN
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And when we drive you always
take the cell phone off my lap like my lap is a crystal you are trying to preserve for harvest Let the vapers vape when you call to say how sorry How Sorry How Sorry |
SEXY PUMPKIN
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That woman just wanted a baby
from your papa, a little Jason They named him Ray Ariel and he looked like you – like a sexy pumpkin pie that’s what you said when I drove an hour to the Bronx to give you money for food when I drove and we drove and I swallowed this female thing this emotional labor bricks to the stomach an unexpected sibling your papa never sees Ray Ariel, and he never sees you either you don’t even have his cell phone number and your Abuelita won’t give it to you and so what and can I sit near you while we eat this Chinese food prepared behind dirty plexiglass on 149th and 3rd real long chicken wings cut from whole brown glazed chickens |
I DON'T WANT TO LOVE YOU THE WAY YOU LOVE ME
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Instead be gold leaf on the tip
of an earlobe like Sam Smith and the world ends and summer ends again feeling To drop the holy host after a dance and buy nothing but lip gloss at the church bazaar sale, at midnight the mood swing drowned me in a water hole seven months before the birth fathering and then bar hops with absent fathers under fat moons and I wish I could tell you I have something left after thousands of dollars spent on manicures in unlicensed salons because you liked the way my hand looked when I touched your dick aren’t you at all curious about what it feels like to be touched by an Angel like Dante when he drew seven P’s on my forehead with a sword and said ‘when you are inside be sure to wash these wounds away’ the Irish cross won’t protect you girl and the angel might stop calling and even block your number its easy now like pool boys in Bermuda shorts near Upstate New York easy like drinking maroon water ice and ignoring guests requests for refills I can ignore too the work of the poem or your shooter fantasies how they fill wounds before the newscasts verify the fears of 21st century children on their knees and we can talk trauma that kept us out of the Ivy League and crippled us mediocre in all these important ways You like when I am mediocre You say “put your cheer skirt on” and “cup your breasts, pudding pop” “stop causing trouble stop Googling “Kim K” and “stop talking about your baby brother or walking down the boulevard unarmed or how you are afraid to leave the house” “stop saying you are fat and then eating” and “stop crying in feminist theory seminars being like it is so hard to be a girl, and all my problems come from the belief that I can love you only if I’m straddling you and you are disinterested dead and pale blue |
Laura Marie Marciano is a poet, media artist, and educator. She is the founder of gemstone readings, a collective that supports the narratives of female-identified poets and media artists. Her first book of poetry, Mall Brat, is forthcoming from Civil Coping Mechanisms . She lives on the Internet.
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